I have officially started my student teaching this semester. I have loved every minute of it so far. There was some anxiety at first, but everything went fine. I'm in a fourth grade classroom in Milwaukee. The school is probably the best school I have been at. My teacher is definitely great at her job too. I am learning tons of classroom management tools. Within a couple of weeks I have to be the main teacher for at least half the day, then I will progress to teaching the entire day.
In between planning lessons, I'm trying to plan my job hunt. It's so odd to be at this point in my life! I"m moving into an entire new part of my life. In some ways, I'd even say it's the biggest change in my life. I wouldn't say marriage because that wasn't nerve wracking like this is!
One sad thing that has happened this semester is my one class that correlates with mys student teaching meets on a Wednesday night. Which means, I have had to give up teaching my junior high youth group. I hated doing this. I miss them so much. However, I have a feeling God is going to use this semester as a time of rejuvenation in Him. Plus, God is making me step up in other ways in the church which is exciting. I'm leading communion for both services this Sunday. I'm a little nervous for that because first service is packed! I normally only go to second service, which is much smaller. I'm not as nervous getting up and talking in front of that group!
Well, that's about it for now I suppose! OH, Ben did get his first story published. He is an official published author now :) I'm reading his third novel right now, which so far is great!
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!!
Well Belcher Cousins, today is my Mom's 50th birthday. If you think of it - send her a message or give her a call. I know she would get a kick out of it. Especially since she never reads these blogs! I'm excited for the day. I am taking her out to get a manicure or a pedicure, she gets to decide. I also got her a funny birthday card that says: "You know what's wonderful about being 50? You are two HOT 25 year old's wrapped into ONE!" haha. I think it is cute. I still have to sneak out of the house to go buy her the balloons. Instead of getting one 50 year old over the hill balloon, I am going to get two balloons that say 25, to go along with the card!
I pray everyone has a wonderful Christmas! I love you all!
Monday, December 6, 2010
Inconsiderate Professors
I know God says to love your enemies, but today I realized how extremely difficult it is to love someone who has wronged you. I have a professor who never emails you back, does not do her job, and leaves you hanging with no clue what to do for assignments. This professor, did not answer my three emails all in which had some connection to do with Grandma, until a week later. I had explained that I had to go to Grandma's funeral, which with traveling, would be difficult to work on an end of the semester project. She refused to give me an extension. That was the first reason that made me not like her. The second is she did not respond to any of my questions in the emails. Then, today, I go to campus for my evening class. I waited around until 4:20, but became suspicious when no one else had showed up for class yet. I text a few people and sure enough there was no class. It really frustrated me because I had emailed her so many times yet she does not have the decency to communicate with me. I guess on top of my stress and still grieving over Grandma, I was extremely upset. The fact that she knows what I have been going through, it would have been considerate of her to communicate that there was no class. Driving to campus and back took out 30-40 minutes of my day. Plus, I grabbed dinner at Jimmy Johns, because I was so hungry! I knew I wouldn't have time to eat before class. So she cost me money and my time. I just cannot even fathom showing love to this woman.
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Love and Grandma
Hello everyone. I thought I would try writing about the funeral and everything. It really isn't so much as to write a blog entry as it is for me to get my feelings down. I'm sure you all are struggling with this just as much if not more as I am.
I have made it home from the long trip to and from Missouri. I think I am actually doing worse now that I am away from the funeral. It really hurts, almost to the point of physical pain. On the way home, I kept feeling like this whole weekend has been a dream. I am still in denial. I think to myself, there is no possible way that both Grandma and Grandpa have left this Earth. All I want to do right now is to call them at their home to tell them how much I love them both. I have resisted the temptation to call Grandma's cell phone right now. I just wanted to be able to hear her voice. I don't think her voice is actually on the voicemail recording, otherwise I probably would have called her.
I brought home flowers from the funeral. I thought they would somehow make me feel better. I love and am proud of my two plants I was able to bring home from Grandpa's funeral. I think I despise the flowers I took this time. I just want to throw them away.
I know Grandma has been in pain for years. Yet, through it all, she has always overcame. And I know, that while she has suffered, she has brought many people, probably even complete strangers, a glimpse of joy. But that is the thing, through it all, she has never given up. I remember about two maybe three years ago around fourth of July when I thought she wasn't going to make it. The doctors told us she probably wouldn't make it through the night. I remember praying with Josh at the hospital's chapel. God gave me a peace that she would make it through the night, and she did. So why now? Why did it have to take so long? I know we cannot live forever, but it is so unreal to think that death finally took Grandma. I guess I should think of it as God bringing her home.
And while God has given me the peace that she is truly at home with Him, it still hurts. It may continue like this forever. I can honestly say that there is no other person like Grandma Tena in the world. There is no other Grandpa in the world either. Together, they were amazing. They could bring us laughter, joy, comfort . . .
I do not know how the two of them made it through life. I almost feel ashamed at how well off I am. I have never felt the pain and suffering Grandma and Grandpa went through in life both together and individually.
Grandma - Grandpa: I dedicate my life to living a lifestyle that you two showed me how to live. One where I truly love my neighbor as the Scripture encourages. One where I can love a stranger as if they were my own family. One where I do not give up because I am tired. One where I put God and my family above everything else in my life. One where I pass on the legacy that has been passed down to me.
One more thing - I honestly feel like Grandma personified love. She did not need to preach God's word because she acted it out.
I love you all.
I have made it home from the long trip to and from Missouri. I think I am actually doing worse now that I am away from the funeral. It really hurts, almost to the point of physical pain. On the way home, I kept feeling like this whole weekend has been a dream. I am still in denial. I think to myself, there is no possible way that both Grandma and Grandpa have left this Earth. All I want to do right now is to call them at their home to tell them how much I love them both. I have resisted the temptation to call Grandma's cell phone right now. I just wanted to be able to hear her voice. I don't think her voice is actually on the voicemail recording, otherwise I probably would have called her.
I brought home flowers from the funeral. I thought they would somehow make me feel better. I love and am proud of my two plants I was able to bring home from Grandpa's funeral. I think I despise the flowers I took this time. I just want to throw them away.
I know Grandma has been in pain for years. Yet, through it all, she has always overcame. And I know, that while she has suffered, she has brought many people, probably even complete strangers, a glimpse of joy. But that is the thing, through it all, she has never given up. I remember about two maybe three years ago around fourth of July when I thought she wasn't going to make it. The doctors told us she probably wouldn't make it through the night. I remember praying with Josh at the hospital's chapel. God gave me a peace that she would make it through the night, and she did. So why now? Why did it have to take so long? I know we cannot live forever, but it is so unreal to think that death finally took Grandma. I guess I should think of it as God bringing her home.
And while God has given me the peace that she is truly at home with Him, it still hurts. It may continue like this forever. I can honestly say that there is no other person like Grandma Tena in the world. There is no other Grandpa in the world either. Together, they were amazing. They could bring us laughter, joy, comfort . . .
I do not know how the two of them made it through life. I almost feel ashamed at how well off I am. I have never felt the pain and suffering Grandma and Grandpa went through in life both together and individually.
Grandma - Grandpa: I dedicate my life to living a lifestyle that you two showed me how to live. One where I truly love my neighbor as the Scripture encourages. One where I can love a stranger as if they were my own family. One where I do not give up because I am tired. One where I put God and my family above everything else in my life. One where I pass on the legacy that has been passed down to me.
One more thing - I honestly feel like Grandma personified love. She did not need to preach God's word because she acted it out.
I love you all.
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Fast Quick Healthy Food
Anyone have suggestions for fast, quick, healthy food? I barely have time to cook. As a result, I have been eating a lot of unhealthy stuff. Also, cheap would be nice! :)
Monday, October 18, 2010
Here's to Monday
I recently read an article by Jon Swanson. He is great. I receive all my daily devotions from him. Every now and then I get one that I'm just like, oh that was nice. Today's devotion was right on the head. Perfect. It was about how sometimes you don't want to pray with the "Dear God" or "My heavenly father" that I know I was taught with. You just want to mumble, complain, be like hey God. Which, when you think about it, I don't think Jesus' disciples talked to Him by saying "Dear Jesus."
Anyway - Here's to Mondays: the feeling of not wanting to start another week, the exhaustion you feel waking up, the headache of knowing you have 5 full days to get through until the weekend.
What is amazing is that by the time Friday rolls around, I know I will feel confidant in the week and what it has produced. It is just these Mondays that are so difficult to get through. Then again, it could have just been today.
Anyway - Here's to Mondays: the feeling of not wanting to start another week, the exhaustion you feel waking up, the headache of knowing you have 5 full days to get through until the weekend.
What is amazing is that by the time Friday rolls around, I know I will feel confidant in the week and what it has produced. It is just these Mondays that are so difficult to get through. Then again, it could have just been today.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Life is Life
I love watching the show Parenthood. There are so many real life issues presented. It is interesting seeing how the characters work through them all. One family has a son with aspergers,another couple is trying to make it work rather than get divorced, and another one is dealing with unemployment (wife works husband parents). Of course there are the family issues revolving around the kids with boyfriends, drugs, friendships, etc. In a way, I find the show encouraging. Through everything that happens, they all stay together as a family. They can lean on one another for support. Sometimes it can be frustrating, but in the end, they always come back together.
The show demonstrates that life is life, you might as well just take it and move on. We all have our struggles, they just vary from person to person. It doesn't make the struggle any less real for the people going through it.
For Ben and I, we have been going through some struggles this summer, well, this past year. He had been stuck at a job he hated, Brooks Brothers. He started out loving it, but began to despise selling thousand dollar suits to rich people who didn't need it. He needed more meaning in his life. So, he left (taking a significant pay cut) to become a re-sale shop manager for Teen Challenge, a non-profit Christian drug rehabilitation center. Here, Ben was able to pour his self into the students enrolled in the program. It combined his passion for people and ministry with his skill set of selling.
Well, that position didn't last long for a variety of reasons. In the end, they decided to terminate his position. The shop wasn't making much money. So, Ben was/is unemployed. Luckily, I decided to not to do summer classes in order to work full time as a summer camp teacher. We were able to have a nice steady income throughout the summer months.
When school began in the fall, Ben still had not found a new job. I began to get anxious wondering how we were going to get by. I was taking 18 extremely heavy courses in school, plus working 20 hours (sometimes more), as well as leading youth group with Ben and our friends Ben and Brooke. I was getting closer and closer to my breaking limit. This fact put a strain on our relationship. I became snippy, nagging, etc. out of my stress.
Ben began to work for his Dad, who is the Vice President of a telecommunications company called Business Fitness. They work to save companies money on phone or internet services. In return, the company gets a certain cut of the money saved. While this is great for Ben (provides a challenge, flexible hours, works with his Dad, etc) it does not bring in money right away. It will take some time before he gets the connections with companies that he needs. He has to spend time going over bills, expenses, etc. before he can write a savings offer to companies.
In the midst of this, Ben was offered a management training position with a company called Allen Edmonds. This is similar to Brooks Brothers because it is a high end retail company specializing in shoes. It would have provided stability in income and benefits. While Ben and I prayed, we both came to the realization that this would be another dead end road for Ben. He may enjoy it for a few months, but would quickly grow to hate it. Plus, he would have to work 40 + hours, then may have to relocate after a year. In the end, he'd still be looking for a different job.
After a very difficult discussion, I decided to support Ben in his decision to decline the position. I had to completely put my faith in God. I also had to not turn on Ben for not taking the position later on when I became stressed. After all, I had given him my support.
Now, perhaps God is taking us in the direction He wants us. Ben has acquired some new clients for his father's company. I am beginning orientation tomorrow for a new tutoring job that pays a very high hourly wage. This will allow me to free up time in my schedule to focus on school.
I just have to keep putting my faith in God. We have a lot of good things ahead of us in our future. Sometimes it is easy to get caught up in all the small technicalities of life that seem to go wrong. For instance - our car that would cost more than $1,000 to fix. Now, we are in the process of looking for a new used car. Oh - our other car needs a $400 repair before winter time too.
In the end of it all - I have a lot of optimism towards the future. Everyday I grow more passionate about educating students. I am beginning what I hope to be a weekly venture of visiting schools in the area. Next Friday, I start with Ozaukee Christian School, the week after Glen Hills just a few blocks away from my house. My college life is coming to the end. It has been enjoyable but difficult.
I am looking forward to the new segment of Ben and I's lives that will begin shortly. He has many publishers interested in his novel The Dreamer, and we both believe his second novel, Unlucky, will be an even bigger hit.
Everyone can view Ben's blog at: http://fidzo.wordpress.com/
Here's to putting our faith in God!
The show demonstrates that life is life, you might as well just take it and move on. We all have our struggles, they just vary from person to person. It doesn't make the struggle any less real for the people going through it.
For Ben and I, we have been going through some struggles this summer, well, this past year. He had been stuck at a job he hated, Brooks Brothers. He started out loving it, but began to despise selling thousand dollar suits to rich people who didn't need it. He needed more meaning in his life. So, he left (taking a significant pay cut) to become a re-sale shop manager for Teen Challenge, a non-profit Christian drug rehabilitation center. Here, Ben was able to pour his self into the students enrolled in the program. It combined his passion for people and ministry with his skill set of selling.
Well, that position didn't last long for a variety of reasons. In the end, they decided to terminate his position. The shop wasn't making much money. So, Ben was/is unemployed. Luckily, I decided to not to do summer classes in order to work full time as a summer camp teacher. We were able to have a nice steady income throughout the summer months.
When school began in the fall, Ben still had not found a new job. I began to get anxious wondering how we were going to get by. I was taking 18 extremely heavy courses in school, plus working 20 hours (sometimes more), as well as leading youth group with Ben and our friends Ben and Brooke. I was getting closer and closer to my breaking limit. This fact put a strain on our relationship. I became snippy, nagging, etc. out of my stress.
Ben began to work for his Dad, who is the Vice President of a telecommunications company called Business Fitness. They work to save companies money on phone or internet services. In return, the company gets a certain cut of the money saved. While this is great for Ben (provides a challenge, flexible hours, works with his Dad, etc) it does not bring in money right away. It will take some time before he gets the connections with companies that he needs. He has to spend time going over bills, expenses, etc. before he can write a savings offer to companies.
In the midst of this, Ben was offered a management training position with a company called Allen Edmonds. This is similar to Brooks Brothers because it is a high end retail company specializing in shoes. It would have provided stability in income and benefits. While Ben and I prayed, we both came to the realization that this would be another dead end road for Ben. He may enjoy it for a few months, but would quickly grow to hate it. Plus, he would have to work 40 + hours, then may have to relocate after a year. In the end, he'd still be looking for a different job.
After a very difficult discussion, I decided to support Ben in his decision to decline the position. I had to completely put my faith in God. I also had to not turn on Ben for not taking the position later on when I became stressed. After all, I had given him my support.
Now, perhaps God is taking us in the direction He wants us. Ben has acquired some new clients for his father's company. I am beginning orientation tomorrow for a new tutoring job that pays a very high hourly wage. This will allow me to free up time in my schedule to focus on school.
I just have to keep putting my faith in God. We have a lot of good things ahead of us in our future. Sometimes it is easy to get caught up in all the small technicalities of life that seem to go wrong. For instance - our car that would cost more than $1,000 to fix. Now, we are in the process of looking for a new used car. Oh - our other car needs a $400 repair before winter time too.
In the end of it all - I have a lot of optimism towards the future. Everyday I grow more passionate about educating students. I am beginning what I hope to be a weekly venture of visiting schools in the area. Next Friday, I start with Ozaukee Christian School, the week after Glen Hills just a few blocks away from my house. My college life is coming to the end. It has been enjoyable but difficult.
I am looking forward to the new segment of Ben and I's lives that will begin shortly. He has many publishers interested in his novel The Dreamer, and we both believe his second novel, Unlucky, will be an even bigger hit.
Everyone can view Ben's blog at: http://fidzo.wordpress.com/
Here's to putting our faith in God!
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